Comrades of the world—awaken! It's been brought to my attention that OKCupid is overrun with fascist bourgeois counter-revolutionaries and foreign agents provocateurs. Comrades, their continued imperialist aggression can no longer stand!

We must regroup, and replenish our strength and numbers. The following commissars have been approved by the Central Directorate to lead your local soviet's vanguard in the Revolution's next phase. So go forth—and let a thousand flowers bloom!

Sexy Trotskyist seeks sexy comrade to engage in sexy revolutionary action against forms of patriarchy and oligarchy. I am a white female comrade who enjoys long walks on the beach, a lover of cats and animals, enjoys biology and medicine. I am going to Sarah Lawrence in August and hope to find someone in the Bronx/NYC area. I am also interested in activism, and hopefully will be joining a workers right club while I'm in Sarah Lawrence. I will be studying pre med to become a neurosurgeon eventually. I am not a weed smoker but I am interested in trying psychedelics. I enjoy political rants and debates, philosophical ramblings, radical feminism, and battling cynicism brought on by bourgeoisie society. I am not seeking anarchists or social democrats, only true marxist/leninists/maoists/trotskyists.

Ok, comrades (cough), I'm a very nearly 30 cis gay white man of the bear variety who is ready to settle for someone who doesn't say sexist, racist, or transphobic things. This type of man homo, it turns out, is in short supply. I would also be down for some short term action with an FBI informant muscle cub. My life priorities are: 1) Game of Thrones 2) sourdough bread 3) the struggle/rum. I especially enjoy using numbers to describe the absurdities of capitalism, and musing about the future socialist society. PM me. We have a world to win.

21 y/o cis bi female. Anachro-communist. Feminist. Xicana/NDN currently majoring in psychology, mastering in the art of getting by on minimum wage. I seek out small animals and fellow comrades. Local to southern california.

Hoping to see abolition and reparations through permanent access to wealth within my lifetime. That or to invent the necessary biotechnological apparatus to become the first real-life borg-cell. like black militant literature and theories that focus on 'stupidity.' I'm 26, queer, flexible, engineer-educated performance artist living in Baltimore and I like bicycles.

W4M, 41 Boston— Geeky female looking to start a revolution... IN MY PANTS! Or something. I stick it to The Man every day by eschewing the dominant capitalist paradigm (i.e., being mostly unemployed). I'm looking for that special comrade to disappoint (and be disappointed by). Let's make beautiful awkward silence together!

I'm vegan and anarchist, or more precisely, vegetarian ecofeminist. I'm a straight male living in Northern California, but would prefer to be in a cooler, wetter (enough drought already, oh and also, enough of these bourgeois wine grape growers, faux liberals, pseudo-Buddhists, and assorted New Agers) climate. I'm also a Ph.D. student, on the cusp of candidacy (should happen this Fall), in Human Science.

41, (lives life like I'm 21) UK resident old-school socialist male, radical trade unionist, seeks likeminded revolutionary Guardian reading female types for usual leftie pastimes (writing strong letters, leafletting, picketi lines, overthrowing governments, world socialist domination etc). Must like cats.

Southern expat white Brooklynite syndicalist queer woman organizer for trans and sex worker rights. Also write science fiction and listen to lots of metal, country, hardcore, and pop (it's not unusual for my playlists to have Magrudergrind and Taylor Swift). Attracted to androgynous and masculine people of all sorts who are confident, witty, and focused. Different opinions are fine, but arrogance and close-mindedness are not (except about capitalism and white supremacist patriarchy, totally fine to just mock those mercilessly). Scum fucks, insurrectionists, lifestyle anarchists, tumblr zealots, and white people with dreadlocks need not apply.

23 year old trans woman pre op pre hrt. pansexual (mostly attracted to female gendered people tho); LA, California. I'm not really aligned anywhere too tangible. I take a lot from anarchism and especially feminism, I'm definitely a socialist. However, my penchant for the dialectical has me in a constant state of observation. I pride myself in intellectualism, even tho I do not always exemplify it (who does, really). I'm a writer, I destroy TERFism, and I have a big heart that leads me to take care of people more than I should.

21 year old straight cis male. I'm a nonsectarian anarchist who finds particular affinities with individualist, nihilist, existentialist, postmodern, queer, feminist, post-left and insurrectionary strains of thought. Some of my favorite thinkers include Bakunin, Stirner, Nietzsche, Emma Goldman, Wolfi Landstreicher, and the CrimethInc. Ex-Workers Collective. Hobbies include reading, walking, playing music, and decadently consuming french press coffee and microbrews.

сосать мой член! hello comrades, please like if you think im gud lookin', comment if intersted. 27, uk, millitant communathsesit who respects and serves the people every day. also intersted in anime, hentai, annomyous and commrade putin. thanks and ебать систему!

30 year old female. Straight, UU vegan, childfree, crazy cat lady and public school teacher in Chicago (CTU Local 1!) who tries to be an anti-bias educator. Socialist in belief, stuck in the cycle of capitalism in practice. Looking for a leftist with good credit. After all, I believe in sharing resources, but not paying YOUR bills

My name is Evgeny Alekseyevich Magpiyski. I come from the Motherland. I abide in the land of capitalist piglets. I am good hard worker. Every night I cut beets and turnips and make soup for my fellow comrade.


I am also Engineer, Trust me I fix. If not broken yet, I break. I don't have blood alcohol level, I have alcohol blood level. The police measure how much blood I have in my alcohol to see if I can drive. I support my local party of John Lennin, and IMAGINE countless possibilities for freedom of the brotherhood and sisterhood. You should totally come to my book of faces and date me. Da.

I'm such an effeminate 40 year CIS male that I recently cried when Michael Sam, the SEC defensive player of the year and first openly gay football ,was drafted and kissed his boyfriend. I hate wealth creation, but love bonobo feminists. Friend me if you are interested.

I am ... from Plymouth, UK. I'm a professional and lifestyle Mistress - and I am always interested in meeting hot kinky socialists of all genders.

I'm a Trotskyist based in a small town in north west England. I have a particular interest in history, mental health, learning disabilities/difficulties and counseling. Dislikes include privilege theory and Stalinism. Aside from politics I enjoy roleplaying games and reading.

Revolutionary socialist cis-queer polysexual woman who engages in activities related to theatre, cats, baking, knife-throwing, stomping about, singing at inopportune times, inappropriate outbursts, loitering, eating, and reading things.


I like some things, but not other things. I'd tell you what I wanted if I had any idea.

[Lead image via Ten Thousand Miles]