I wrote a letter to my bully old doctor who fired me, demanding he hand over my medical records. But I feel like it's not mean enough.

I want him to at least get a raised heart rate when he reads this. Maybe some flushing of the face. I need some pleasures in life.

So tell me how to make it more evil-sounding yet legal. Like a $500-an-hour trial lawyer wrote it. Something with more bite. Can we do this? (Someone with privileges could you share this to Clashtalk? I figure they're experts.)

Twizzler

Address, etc.

DATE

Doctor A-Hole

Address Etc.

RE: FINAL REQUEST FOR MY MEDICAL RECORDS

Dear Dr. A-Hole:

I hereby request copies of all my medical records. As you know, I am entitled to my records under HIPAA, the federal Health Insurance Portability Accountability Act, as well as federal Department of Health and Human Services regulations.

I was treated in your office beginning in 2012. I formally request copies of any and all records related to my treatment, including medical history form, lab results, test results, physicians' notes, nurses' notes, staff notes, front office notes, consultations, referrals, and any other information contained in patient files relating to me.

I understand you may charge a reasonable fee for copying the records, but are not allowed to charge for time spent locating the records. You may also charge me postage for mailing the records.

I look forward to receiving the above records within 30 days to the above address, as specified under HIPAA. If this request cannot be honored, I expect to be informed with a dated letter stating the reasons for the refusal.

If I do not receive my records or a response, I will forward this letter to the appropriate state and federal authorities.

Sincerely,

Twizzler

One Pissed-Off Lane

Abused and Not Gonna Take It, Of Course It's Florida