Human Leather is Possibly the Grossest Thing I Have Seen All Week

I am sort of throwing up a little inside right now, but it seems that for those who think alligator bags are not exclusive enough, there is… human skin?

According to a UK website, Humanleather.co.uk, which it should be noted has not updated its copyright since 2008, the discerning collector can purchase a belt, a wallet or even a pair of shoes made of what the site describes as “the finest leather known.”

I call shenanigans. The British are known for loving some strange things, like breast milk ice cream and tax supported royals, but serial killer mementos is going a little far.

Also, calfskin leather is the finest leather known. Everyone knows that. Peeled baby cows always beat peeled baby humans. I kind of hate myself for writing that last sentence, but, um, truth?

Who in the world can this appeal to you ask? People who may currently have someone strapped to a gurney in their basement? Those guys you hear about that get together to eat the last cute fuzzy little creature on some endangered species list?

From their pricing lists, which funny enough do not include British Pounds, it seems Europeans and Americans.

So the next time that slick Patrick Bateman type pulls out his wallet to pay for a round or asks you to admire his new belt, I guess just to be on the safe side, mention how you never could get rid of those chicken pox scars from childhood.