'Thong Cape Scooter Man' rides on

Authorities at an elementary school in Madison., Wis., were worried that the sight of a cheeky dude riding past on a scooter wearing nothing but a thong, helmet and cape (hey — he's wearing a helmet!) might disturb the kids (not to mention the adults). So they called the cops, who zipped on over.
After a brief chat with the 56-year-old man, who already had what is now a sure-to-be-growing presence on social media ("He said he exercised poor judgment by going by the school at that time of day, it was unintentional," police spokesman Joel DeSpain said) and a check with the city attorney's office, it was determined that no laws were breached.
Butt dude, think of the children. Put on some pants. What you're doing may not be illegal. That doesn't mean it's not a crime.