Friday:

Arrive at the hotel at 10 a.m. Get told that my room won't be ready until noon. Pay two euros for them to store my luggage until then. Wander around the neighborhood, realize it's a Hasidim ghetto with nearly nothing a tourist would be even remotely interested in. Decide to kill time playing Mario Kart 7 at a cafe. Order a pint with it just to feel like I'm on vacation. Finally check into the hotel, chill out, meet one of my traveling companions. Decide to explore the neighborhood a bit more, find it as dull as we expected until we found one of the last smoking bars in Europe. Did five pints each there, then got given free Jager rounds. Back to the hotel to recover, take a taxi out to the Latin Quarter, wander for a long time because it's awesome, find a small restaurant on a side street with only eight tables and a menu written on a chalkboard and have an awesome dinner. Back to the smoking bar where they are now setting shots on fire on the bar with a blowtorch. Do more pints there - including one that is 40 percent beer, 40 percent hard cider, two shots of vodka and a splash of alcoholic peach syrup served in one glass. Stay there until rational thought is impossible.

Saturday:

Get up around 10 or so. Shower and get rid of vague hangover. Head back to cafe from the morning before for traveling companion to have a pint and a coffee and for me to just have a pint since I'm not supposed to drink coffee. Head to central Paris to scope out the place where I'm supposed to meet my friend I'm going to the concert with. Realize we can easily find it later on, walk up and down the river, check out tourist spots. Have a really nice lunch. Have pints in two dive bars. Meet up with concert friend at 5 p.m. Head off with her to have a drink before we navigate public transportation to see The Wall. Watch The Wall, have a good time, head back to hotel neighborhood and do beers/shots at smoking bar until some drunk dude spills beer on my clothes and I get annoyed.

Sunday:

Me and non Wall going traveling companion go back to the cafe when we get kicked out of the hotel at 10 a.m. She does a pint and coffee with croisants and other bread like objects. I stick to the pint. She wants to have a "long boozy lunch" at a restaurant one of her friends was raving about after her last trip to Paris. We do a four hour lunch there with lots of beer, food, calvados, Bailey's, etc.... Put her on the train at 4:30. Realize I have five hours before my train leaves. Am food and booze tired but nowhere possible to sleep and don't want to get super hungover in the afternoon. Pick up my luggage from the hotel - paying them another two euros for them storing it while I was doing lunch - and find a quiet bar. Nurse pints very slowly while reading a book and checking out people walking by. Around 7:30 head over to my train station (a different one from hers) where there is nothing but shitty bars around. Wander side streets. Find a reasonable bar where it is happy hour. Do three pints there, talking to a cool Australian couple, head back to the train station around 8:45, navigate the weird labyrinth that is the station, pay two euros to pee, get on train, buy a ham and cheese sandwhich and two beers and then play Mario Kart/sleep until my train gets back to Montpellier sometime after 1 a.m.