1. You are Beatrix Kiddo and pretty much ARE feminism.

2. You hate women including yourself, so it doesn't really help your agenda.

3. You are Kate Middleton. Or whatever her name is now and have MI6 to keep you safe and all the money in the world and never plan on being in a car near a Paris tunnel.

4. You are Hermione Granger and have mastered the Patriarchus Defeatist spell.

5. You are Charlie Sheen and it just gets in the way.

6. The lobotomy your husband suggested worked as intended.

7. You are living in the world 100 years from now.

8. You are Sonya Blade and have just defeated Shao Kahn.

9. You don't have time for it because your baby daddy needs you on the streets making money.

10. You are dead.