I don't know of any cool-but-responsible parents' boards, so I'm posting here for thoughts. Just got the latest iTunes receipt for purchases by my 12-year-old daughter. Cool girl, musically still doing some of the girl-pop stuff but starting to pay attention to cooler things (I intro'd her to the Clash and Replacements recently, and she dug it). So I see she's bought a couple of tracks from Eminem's latest (Rap God and another). Now, I love Eminem, in uncensored versions, and I do recall my mortification when my mother, on my room when I was 9, hearing The Eagles' Life in the Fast Lane (which uses "damn," big deal in the day) and yet not being corrupted by it, but I want to talk to her about the lyrics without her cringing and clamming up. I know she's got a few Beasties songs on her phone, and I haven't shared others with her because kickin with whores and recognizing your girlfriend in the backseat of a cab by the back of her head (going down on some dude) are maybe not the things I want to introduce her to, not when she's too young to get the context or not be overly affected by it. I don't want to be the over-anxious parent (music was so central to my development), but I don't want her to get a skewed (minimizing) view of pretty adult things by leaving her out there on her own with these things. I know many would just say, no way, but as music with adult themes was, as I said, central to my own development, I don't necessarily want to censor her. So how do you manage/monitor/talk in an educational and responsible way that isn't cringe-inducing or that will cut off communication? Any perspectives or wisdom to share?

Geez, just when I got the hang of pre-adolescence, I'm in adolescence....